Thursday, October 11, 2012

How to Use Your Eyes to Develop Effective Communication Skills



Cliché as it is, the eyes are indeed the windows of the soul. The eye body language is one of the most powerful mediums of nonverbal communication. It can either support or betray whatever you are saying. Even the slightest movement of the eye can indicate the biggest meaning.

Eye Contact

During a conversation, it is normal to have eye contact. It means differently in specific situations. Looking at a person directly to the eye means that you are interested in what he is saying. But the inability to take the eyes of another person when he or she is talking may also indicate doubt, suspicion, or lack of trust.

Appropriate use of eye contact also includes when to break eye contact. A long eye contact has many interpretations. It may mean a focused attention or sign of attraction. But this can sometimes be uncomfortable, thus the trick is to just look at the bridge of the nose. Long eye contact may also indicate a sign of authority or domination if one can do it without much blinking. However, prolonged eye contact may also pose as a threat, so breaking it from now and then is essential. But breaking it may indicate other meanings as well, such as situations wherein one wants to end the conversation, has been insulted or found out, or is being threatened.

Eye Movements

The eyes looking at different directions also have different meanings. When one looks up to the right, it means that he is imagining visual images.  Meanwhile, when he looks up to the left direction, it means that he is trying to recall a memory. However, there are still instances where it is in a reversed order, depending on the person. Try to test him first by asking him to recall a known memory and to picture out an event.

On the other hand, looking down may mean that one is talking to himself, but this is more evident if there is also movement of the lips. It is also a signal of guilt or submission. Looking down on another person means that he is control of the situation or is talking to someone who is under his superiority.

Lateral eye movements can also indicate signs of dishonesty, distraction, or simply checking out the surroundings. When looking from one eye to the other then going up to the forehead, it means that you are looking at somebody with superiority. When going down to the nose, you are talking to someone within the level of your status. And when looking from one eye to the other and down to the lips, it indicates a sign of attraction or romance.

Eyes of Expression


Different emotions and mood can be expressed through gazing, glancing, winking, squinting, closing, and staring. Gazing indicates interest or concentration. Glancing indicates desire. For example, one glances at food. It means the food is desirable to eat. Winking indicates an agreement and it could also be a means of flirtation. A person squints his eyes when he is uncertain or trying to evaluate or verify truthfulness. Closing the eyes means that the person wants a moment to be away from the world or simply trying to remember. And lastly, staring indicates a state of shock, surprise or disbelief.

Eyes of Romance and Flirtation

You can use your eyes to show affection to another person. Winking is one way to flirt. The process of looking at someone, quickly looking away, and then staring back is an obvious indication of attraction. A lingering, warm gaze is also an indicator of romance or desire.

If you know how to read and understand the eye body language, you will know what the person you are conversing with would want to tell you. And, if you know how to properly use it, you can take control of any situation or know when the proper time to use different eye movements or expressions is.

For more information on developing effective communication and leadership skills, visit: 

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